I’ll start by assuming I have some garden variety negative feeling for someone, and that I’m distracted by an intense annoyance. It would be relatively easy to keep whatever is annoying me in place, but change one detail about the situation and dispel all my irritation. So maybe I’m annoyed they’re talking too loud, driving too slow, disturbing my class, a fan of some rival team, etc but then I suddenly discover they are a huge donor to my school. Suddenly I’m discovering I like them, my negative feelings lessen or perhaps never are allowed to arise, their unbearable qualities become endearing quirks etc. So if everyone had something I wanted or admired 99% of the negative feelings I have will never occur.
For a Christian, the admirable trait about others is their ability to acknowledge, give glory, and love the same God whom he loves. Like a fundraiser sees a rich donor, the Christian living out his agape sees the power of his neighbor to love the same God he loves. This is one way of understanding the integral connection between Christ’s two highest commandments, which achieves a special intensity in the Johannine corpus, where love of God and love of neighbor appear as two dimensions or parts of a single act of agape.